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I will survive this and become stronger
August 14, 2005
a person who do not care less about yr finance
even after you explained yr situation, she would demand this and that to be done by when even to the extent of borrowing from other people
a person who make sure u keep yr promise irregardless of what unexpected had happened
a person who dump u aside and say she want to rethink the r/s but all she does is to go pubbing and clubbing and do nothing else
a person who use to cry her heart out as i could no longer stand her rubbish when i initate a break up
but now, she couldnt care less at all
a person who used to demand that I had to stick to her for all days in week and give up all my friends and now, because she has her own friends after 5 years of r/s, she says to tell me to find my own friends.
a person who only cares about herself and only look for you when she needs you
a person who demanded that she only wants to live in a condo even after explaining that its not very possible
a person who longer puts u in priority anymore or even care how you feel
a person who will never sacriface anything for a person who has sacriface everything for her
See Sze Hwei said, what cant kill you only makes you stronger
Vit said, be a better child to your parents, a better pal to your friends, a better colleague - there are lots more people around you who still care
I soemtimes ask why must I go through all the unfair things in this world?
and this i wat miss Teng said
It made me learn to wipe my tears, get up, realize i have my frenz n family, realize life is more than having someone to love.
and i guess many have said in FP.
But ^Juan^ replied truly hits the spot
From Juan:
My guess is that she knows you all too well. That no matter what she does...you will forgive her. And by forgiving her this time...highly likely she will take you even more for granted...since she know...betrayal...you also can forgive.
I may be wrong...but my guess is that she doesn't love you as much as you love her...or even...she does not love you as much as she did before. And she is keeping her options open...and likely finding someone better than you (since she say she wanna live in condo and you ain't able to provide her with it). She's likely to hang on here until she find her next long term ticket. I hope I'm wrong at this...but...my sixth sense tells me that her love have faded...little by little.
I do not know what has changed her...but...a long term relationship faces alot of difficulties. Perhaps you didn't realise that each other's values have changed...or perhaps...even if you have realised and the signs were there...but you chose to ignore them.
Actually...by permitting her to do all those stated above...you have already let her took control of the relationship. And with control...seems like she ain't putting it to a positive usage...but instead abusing it. Abusing ur willingness to sacrifice for her.
If she really loved you and care for you...she won't have hurt you in the first place. Cos any gal which cherish a 5 yr relationship (imagine putting 5 yrs of a gal's youth in a relationship) won't risk doing any harm to it by a betrayal.
I'm a person who is in a 6 and a half yr relationship...and I would never have done any of the above to the person I love. And I even feel thankful for him putting me in priority and sacrificing alot of time he could have spent with his friends. Even if I knew more friends...I won't neglect him and ask him to go find more friends. And if my SO finance got problems...having been together for so long...all the more I should understand him and stand by him.
Obviously ur gal is no longer steadfast in the relationship...and I'm not sure if ur persistence in this relationship is gonna pay off.
I know it's difficult to let go a relationship which you have become so used to...and having to sacrifice so much for. But...if she doesn't change and put in the effort to make the relationship work...you're just gonna get disappointed and get hurt by her again and again. And...you won't know...if she's still with you cos she love you? Cos she knows you are willing to sacrifice for her? Cos she hasn't found a better long term ticket than you at the moment? You won't know...if one fine day...someone better comes along...would she be all ready to move on to a new relationship...leaving you with nothing but heart breaks.
You dun have to make a decision right now...but seriously give it a good thought. Whether it's worth it. You've already given up enough for her. All giving and no taking is unhealthy in a relationship...and seems like...you have given too much till you've spoilt her.
I still think...a man should show his gal who is the boss at times. Of cos...I dun mean beating her or what but letting her know that you ain't one who can be taken for granted for...especially when you are obviously being "ill treated" by her mentally...and perhaps...physcially?
even after you explained yr situation, she would demand this and that to be done by when even to the extent of borrowing from other people
a person who make sure u keep yr promise irregardless of what unexpected had happened
a person who dump u aside and say she want to rethink the r/s but all she does is to go pubbing and clubbing and do nothing else
a person who use to cry her heart out as i could no longer stand her rubbish when i initate a break up
but now, she couldnt care less at all
a person who used to demand that I had to stick to her for all days in week and give up all my friends and now, because she has her own friends after 5 years of r/s, she says to tell me to find my own friends.
a person who only cares about herself and only look for you when she needs you
a person who demanded that she only wants to live in a condo even after explaining that its not very possible
a person who longer puts u in priority anymore or even care how you feel
a person who will never sacriface anything for a person who has sacriface everything for her
See Sze Hwei said, what cant kill you only makes you stronger
Vit said, be a better child to your parents, a better pal to your friends, a better colleague - there are lots more people around you who still care
I soemtimes ask why must I go through all the unfair things in this world?
and this i wat miss Teng said
It made me learn to wipe my tears, get up, realize i have my frenz n family, realize life is more than having someone to love.
and i guess many have said in FP.
But ^Juan^ replied truly hits the spot
From Juan:
My guess is that she knows you all too well. That no matter what she does...you will forgive her. And by forgiving her this time...highly likely she will take you even more for granted...since she know...betrayal...you also can forgive.
I may be wrong...but my guess is that she doesn't love you as much as you love her...or even...she does not love you as much as she did before. And she is keeping her options open...and likely finding someone better than you (since she say she wanna live in condo and you ain't able to provide her with it). She's likely to hang on here until she find her next long term ticket. I hope I'm wrong at this...but...my sixth sense tells me that her love have faded...little by little.
I do not know what has changed her...but...a long term relationship faces alot of difficulties. Perhaps you didn't realise that each other's values have changed...or perhaps...even if you have realised and the signs were there...but you chose to ignore them.
Actually...by permitting her to do all those stated above...you have already let her took control of the relationship. And with control...seems like she ain't putting it to a positive usage...but instead abusing it. Abusing ur willingness to sacrifice for her.
If she really loved you and care for you...she won't have hurt you in the first place. Cos any gal which cherish a 5 yr relationship (imagine putting 5 yrs of a gal's youth in a relationship) won't risk doing any harm to it by a betrayal.
I'm a person who is in a 6 and a half yr relationship...and I would never have done any of the above to the person I love. And I even feel thankful for him putting me in priority and sacrificing alot of time he could have spent with his friends. Even if I knew more friends...I won't neglect him and ask him to go find more friends. And if my SO finance got problems...having been together for so long...all the more I should understand him and stand by him.
Obviously ur gal is no longer steadfast in the relationship...and I'm not sure if ur persistence in this relationship is gonna pay off.
I know it's difficult to let go a relationship which you have become so used to...and having to sacrifice so much for. But...if she doesn't change and put in the effort to make the relationship work...you're just gonna get disappointed and get hurt by her again and again. And...you won't know...if she's still with you cos she love you? Cos she knows you are willing to sacrifice for her? Cos she hasn't found a better long term ticket than you at the moment? You won't know...if one fine day...someone better comes along...would she be all ready to move on to a new relationship...leaving you with nothing but heart breaks.
You dun have to make a decision right now...but seriously give it a good thought. Whether it's worth it. You've already given up enough for her. All giving and no taking is unhealthy in a relationship...and seems like...you have given too much till you've spoilt her.
I still think...a man should show his gal who is the boss at times. Of cos...I dun mean beating her or what but letting her know that you ain't one who can be taken for granted for...especially when you are obviously being "ill treated" by her mentally...and perhaps...physcially?
